two groaners for the price of none

What do you think Bappi Lahiri's build tool of choice is? Why Maven of course. "How so?" you ask. Well, haven't you heard this song from Justice Chaudhury? That's where you'll find supporting evidence (मामा मिया, POM POM). (waits for the groans and the rain of rotten tomatoes to subside).

I wonder why I never thought of the carriage return as the possible fruit of a collaboration between John LeCarre (who created Control) and Ian Fleming (who created M). Isn't it a nice origin to have had for Control+M? (recedes into the shadows before bricks replace rotten tomatoes)

any which monday but this

Tadka is an Indian restaurant in Alpharetta that shares space with Bamboo Garden (an interesting development in itself) and offers high-priced low-spiced Indian cuisine with ambience (if you go there in winter, choose the couches by the fireplace). What it lacks is just that extra dose of seasoning to elevate the dishes from bland and classy to lip-smacking delicious.

If you wanted to find out what time their location was open, however, you would see something that was either the product of creative genius or just the result of bad editing. You just have to ask yourself one question: which Monday will Tadka be open?

MSFT for MARTA

Has MARTA considered approaching MSFT to help it survive instead of descending ever so slowly into oblivion? Evidence (see below) suggests that the big M might already have support for the ill-fated transit system in its popular operating system

once a pun a film

If Imtiaz Ali had made Rockstar in the 80s with Govinda instead of Ranbir Kapoor, Farha instead of Nargis Fakhri and Dharmendra instead of Shammi Kapoor, the title would surely have been Pop ko Jalaakar Rock kar Doonga

zingers

If Google had been called Thirty instead of Google, their recent foray into social networking could have given Jeetendra his most profitable endorsement contract.

Does I am Bombay to know qualify as an Indian entry in the tome of rhyming slang? ("dying" replaced by "Bombay" (Bombay Dyeing))

I would like to trademark the term Pan Parag (पान पराग) Developer to refer to developers who always seem to think "One class is not enough; I must write several classes to do something simple" (of course you remember the ad featuring Jalal Agha!)

How's this for the opening line of a story or book?: a granola bar fell out of the box and to its death

I'd like Prem Chopra to make a comeback as a sleazy Bollywood villain with the line My name is Madan; show me your badan (बदन)

Watching bad Telugu movies is a gulTi (गुल्टी) pleasure

Q: What did God say to Jesus on Good Friday?
A: Hang in there

Flamingo of the Fundament would be a great English title for the 1961 film Aas ka Panchhi (आस का पंछी)

Software builds are like hearts; they are bound to be broken

bollygroaner

One of the many shards of "exciting" Bollywood news floating about notes that Akshay Kumar refused a Rs. 15 crore offer to star in Faltu (not to be confused with the already-made critically lauded Bengali film of the same name). The article cites problems with scheduling as the reason, we all know the real reason: अक्षय कुमार फालतू के पैसे नहीं लेता.

another groaner

If Vijay Mallya's daughter got married to a Chinese guy and decided to emulate Miss World 1994, what would she become? A Mallya-Lee.

groaner

If they decide to make a sequel to Mili, they should call it Mil(l)isecond.