Friday, January 10, 2003

ripoff roundup

Every portal you see tells you the same thing. The Badshahs of Bollywood refuse to learn a lesson. Worse yet, they take the wrong lesson. It's Aesop on LSD. With a dash of Lear. No Vincent Price. It's a world populated by star children. Inheriting the lack of acting from their parents. Star pairs deserving of stellar meltdown. Black holes. Last year had its share of inspired movies. This year it's no better. The genetic malapropism from the Malini fold {see movie endurance log} and the white-pants-dancing-South-fan yeah! Agent Jitu's duh-I-could-do-better son are back to haunt the theatres with Kucch to Hai {translation: There's Something Here aka Something Rotten in the State of Denmark}. It's the desi take on I Know What You Did Last Summer. With songs, dances and an extended watered-down hackneyed Indian love story (possibly peppered with ultra-dig don't-I-sound-cool smart-ass lines borrowed from a deep-fried interpretation of English movies. Hopeless.

Ram Gopal Varma's assistant Prabal Pandey decides to use The Twilight Zone: The Movie as raw material for Darna Manaa Hai {aka Fear is Forbidden Here}. Dyspepsia.

And then debutante director Amit Saxena commits an ultimate act of movie necrophilia by exhuming Billy Wilder's noir classic Double Indemnity for Pooja Bhat's production company as Jism (aka: Body). Grief!

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