bona fidaa boredom

Ken Ghosh should stick to directing music videos. If there's any sign that there was at least one brain cell operational during his second directorial venture Fida, it's during the songs (which were FF-friendly enough to almost force you to conclude that this was a hopeless effort). The plot does not lend itself readily for a direct-cog study. What seems to have happened is that scripters Mahajan and Mahajan (Lalit and Sunny respectively) sat down and watched several movies and decided to use the trustworthy Sumeet mixer to blend little Tuka.De from here and there. To use a tech analogy, it would be like downloading the source code for half-a-dozen projects on Jakarta, and filching stuff from different source files instead of simplying using the different libraries out-of-the-box. What struck me most about the film (which marks the return of clueless buddies Ghosh and Shahid Kapur) is how it structurally resembles Ishq Vishk: Cutie-face SK finds himself the target of one girl's affections (Amrita Rao/Kim Sharma) and hopelessly infatuated with another (Shehnaz/Kareena). The first flick used candy-floss collegiana to stuff the gaping holes (aka the rest of the average mainstream flick's film stock), and this one uses revolutionary[sic] ideas like computer hacking, film noir (a new genre, what?), revenge dramas, product placement (Nokia phones, at the very least), and cheeky nostalgia (at one point, Kim's character drops SK's character -- named Jai -- a line that goes shole ke viiruu jaise?). And perhaps Anna (a loud Akhilendra Mishra)'s cellphone ringtone (the theme from The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly) was a dig at Anu Malik (who had ripped this off for a song in Beqabu). And did they mean for Akhilendra Mishra smashing his aide with a cricket bat as a dark dig at Lagaan? Somehow, these questions are as worthless as the film itself. Watch out for the Big Fish preview playing in a theatre. And then reward yourself by noting the typo in do mahine baad. And then, find a Colt and blow your brains out. Or better still, issue a supaarii in the names of Ken Ghosh and Co.